Last week, I ordered a dress online. It was adorable, on sale, and perfect for a bridal shower I’m going to this weekend.
A few days ago, I realized that the dress had not arrived.
“Strange,” I thought. “Perhaps I should investigate.”
I looked up the UPS tracking number.
Status: delivered.
Delivery date: Wednesday, July 22
Wha-huh? It was delivered over a week ago? I called UPS.
“Yes ma’am, according to our records, that package was delivered on Wednesday, July 22.”
“Right, I had to give you the tracking number earlier in this call. You have just told me exactly what the tracking number had already told me. I’m calling to see what I should do since the package did not, in fact, arrive.”
“Have you tried looking in the bushes around your door?”
“I’m sorry?”
“The drivers will sometimes hide a package in the bushes to make it harder for someone to notice it and steal it. Maybe check under the bushes, too. Or, do you have any gardening equipment or kids big wheels or anything outside your door?”
“No”
“Oh. Well sometimes drivers hide them under that stuff, too.”
(WTF?)
“Well, we don’t really have any bushes or anything for a driver to hide a package in. Which, for what it’s worth, seems like an odd strategy since it may well also fool the person who is receiving the package. My silk dress would definitely be ruined by now if it had been sitting under the bushes for a week, especially given the 4 days of rain we’ve had since then.”
“Well then, ma’am, there’s nothing I can do. You can call the company you ordered it from and ask them to set up a trace with us to try to get your money back, but I wouldn’t count on it.”
Terrific.
I called the company I ordered it from, at 2pm on a Wednesday.
“We’re sorry, we are currently closed. Please try your call again during normal business hours.”
(Last time I checked, 2pm on Wednesday IS normal business hours. Perhaps the company is located in Finland.)
Desperate to take SOME dress-finding action, I emailed all the people in my building. (There are only 8 units, including ours, so we all know each other. I wasn’t spamming like 100 people or anything.) “Um, does anyone have a photographic memory for other people’s packages who might remember seeing one for me about a week ago?”
I got 6 emails back, from 6 different units, all with some variation of “that sucks, I’m so sorry, I didn’t see anything, hope you find it.”
Yesterday after work, I walked into the vestibule and, lo and behold, what should I find? My dress! In a box that had already been opened.
Dear new wife of the guy who lives in the only unit I didn’t hear from when I sent out my email seeking my dress: BITCH, I AM TOTALLY ON TO YOU. STOP STEALING MY DRESSES.
I’m sure it was an honest mistake: she took it upstairs, realized it wasn’t hers, and then forgot to bring it back down. But how weird that she didn’t just say that, right? In a building this small, did she think I would think that the dress had just coincidentally appeared, in a box that’s been neatly cut open, and wouldn’t put two and two together? (And if it wasn’t an accident: wouldn’t it have been awesome if she, like, wore the dress out somewhere and I ran into her? Summer sundress wrestlemania!)
Of course, I tried it on and it’s too small. But at least now I have something to send back in exchange for my money, instead of having to beg them to give me a store credit or something.
I once had a swimsuit I ordered from GAP disappear under similar circumstances, only it was never returned to me. They were surprisingly nice about it — sent me a replacement free of charge, only a few questions asked. (The only problem was I had bought it on clearance so had to change colors from the one I already ordered b/c they were out of the one I bought.) It actually bothered me a little because I feel like people could totally scam them, but it worked out for me.
dude! SERIOUSLY!?! i mean, i’m pretty lazy, so i can see taking a while to put something downstairs when i’d been meaning to do it for a while. however, not if a) i had blatantly taken a package with someone else’s name on it, b) also with a different unit number, c) opened it anyway, and d) FINALLY realized OH HEY MAYBE THIS ISN’T FOR ME, WEIRD. i bet one of the VERY FEW OTHER PEOPLE HERE, all of whom know where i live, might be looking for it.
How bizarre! It would really not be that difficult to be like, oh, sorry, this got delivered to my unit by mistake and I didn’t realize right away that it wasn’t for me. My bad! Rather than, hm, it must have APPARATED, Harry Potter style, into and out of the vestibule. In an open box.
nice to know the alternative places UPS has decided are great to leave packages. I will have to remember that for next time although in L.A. there is no freaking rain so at least I wouldn’t have to worry about that
As far as your neighbor goes? WTF?
WAIT! Was it really expensive? If so, then def return it. If you think you could eat the cost, then wrap it up for Christmas or something and leave it at her door with a card:
“Thought you’d like this!”
HEH!
Our neighbors are both retired. I don’t see us having this problem unless we order dentures.
It is weird that she opened it.
I am impressed with you though. I not only don’t order new pretty dresses for bridal showers, I make sure I am out of town so as to avoid them all together.
Um, at least you found it. I’m still waiting for a resolution for my package from a month ago, that I’m pretty sure the mail lady stole. Or some asshat in my building.
At least I got my money back.
I still can’t get over the “hide in the bushes” or “under a big wheel” strategy. Do you think they teach that Day One of training? Or it’s more involved where it’s the grande finale on Day Five?
(Btw, my BlogHer dress got here and didn’t fit so I’m with you on the bummer dress situation. But at least I got it and opened it myself.)
OMG that is so unbelievably rude! I’d be seriously tempted to email her and thank her for returning it. She should feel some shame!
What a bitch!!! Of all the nerve…
I don’t know who I find more odd — your neighbor lady, the company that was closed on a Wednesday afternoon or the UPS person who thought s/he was actually being helpful.
She totally tried it on and waited to see if she could get away with it. You know she did.