Unless you live under a rock, you’ve doubtless heard of John Mayer:

I am not particularly a fan of JohnMay’s music, but if you read gossip magazines (and I do, people, I do.  No shame in my game!) it’s hard to avoid his rotating famous-lady girlfriends, his practical joke antics, his narcissistic fan cruise.

JohnMay is ALSO famous, or so I’m told, for a particular face he makes while performing:

John, let me tell you: you’re lucky that your “lost in the moment” face is what it is, because just one twist of the mouth and you could be toiling away in obscurity.  Why? Read on:

This weekend, I donned a blue pageboy wig (sweaty! And also itchy!) and got on a trolley with 15 other wig-wearing girls to fete one of my best childhood friend’s who’s getting married.   We did all the bachelorette party things (Drinking! Pictures! Flashing the 17 year old boys who mooned us from the window of their  hotel across the street!)  (Wait, that’s not a normal bachelorette party thing? Yeah, I was the one at the back saying a silent prayer “please let them be of age please let them be of age I really don’t want anyone at this party facing charges for doing naughty things to a minor please let them be of age.”)

We went dancing, of course, at a club featuring a DJ backed up by a live bassist and drummer.  It was kind of odd, but it worked.  You felt for the live musicians, though – the  DJ was clearly the star of the show, and they were just playing along.

The drummer looked for all the world like he spends his days working as a CPA.  Pleated khakis, polo shirt, ear-protecting headset, semi-bored expression.  Good for you, dude, getting your musical kicks on a Saturday night.  The bassist, though.  Oh, the bassist.  He had long, 70s southern rock hair, and not in an ironic way.  He writhed and flailed and just generally gave the impression that he felt like this was IT, man, this was ROCKING OUT, despite the fact that he was essentially just mimicking the baseline of whatever the DJ threw down.  But the best was his face.  Instead of a JohnMay-style O face, we had the wince-grimace.  Seriously, I tried to get a picture of it, but the club was too dark.  It looked like he’d just been hit in the nuts, hard.  Seriously, like this:

Except somehow even more wince-y and pinched looking.  It was…kind of hard not to laugh, to be honest.  And as I sat there, throwing stones from my blue-wig-wearing glass house, it occurred to me: this guy could be the best bassist in the history of TIME, and he would still have trouble booking gigs because of that face.  That face may be the only thing standing between him and a real rock n’ roll career.