My Rolling Stone magazine, in a feature on “The Songs of Summer” from 1990 to present, seems to believe that the song “Mr. Brightside” by the Killers is 5 years old.  Which is hilarious, because that song is practically a new release! All the cool kids still have it on their iPod running playlists! It couldn’t possibly be 5 years old.

I also had occasion to consult imdb the other day to get some information about the movie “Almost Famous” and found, to my astonishment, that imdb seems to believe the movie is 9 years old. Almost a decade. Which is just ridiculous because it couldn’t possibly be more than 3 or at the most 4 years ago that I watched it in the theaters.

Finally, someone in the alumni affairs office of my university seems to be laboring under the mistaken impression that I graduated from college so long ago that it’s time to start sending me “teasers” for my 10 year reunion.  I’m sorry, I graduated college in 2001. Like, practically last year. Still YEARS away from a 10 year reunion.  I mean, we practically just started the new millennium! Remember all the crazy partying like it was 1999? Anyone? No?  So truly, there’s no need to start getting me amped up for it now! In fact, in so doing you’ve virtually GUARANTEED that I will immediately recycle all of your correspondence without reading it, which is definitely not a good way to get a check (which is, I assume, what you’re seeking).

While I’m disappointed in these terrible lapses in temporal accuracy, I trust both these publications, and my college, will correct these errors promptly.